working things out the *write* way (i'm so punny sometimes)

I've decided that I have a tendency to focus on daddy/daughter relationships in my stories a lot. A lot.. I would say that if I had one reoccurring pattern or theme for my protagonists, it's that they all have a rack full of issues that necessitate handling.

I can't help but wonder if this is some sort of warped way to work out my own daddy issues, but I'm not sure...because the protagonists are never dealing with the loss so much as the neglect, the anger, or the distance they feel exists between them and the parental unit. I don't have that so much. It would make more sense if I kept killing off the fathers in my case--if the dad died when the child was young like mine--then I could have simple answer to it all.

I know that we write what we know and I make no qualms that the dysfunction in my family running rampant at all times has fueled my writing and the sort of stories that pop out of my brain...but last night as I was lying in bed, taking a red pen to my latest chapter of my novel, it hit me. I've got some weird daddy issues that continuously appear in my stuff. And I wonder if it's the potential of having daddy issues that I cling to. It's something I don't get to have. I don't get to have the fights or the pushing the father off the pedestal on which he stood. I don't have the right to a burning anger for him leaving me behind because his death wasn't by choice so you can't really hold him accountable...

It's just a weird thing. And this rambling most likely makes no sense whatsoever, but it was something I observed recently. The daddy card in my stories. I don't do that with the mother and I've got tons of crazy stories and anecdotes about my mother I could share. Why is that?

::shrugs::

**

In other news, I rewatched the season finale of alias last night.

( whatever I think )

**

I'm debating on whether to continue with the ficlet requests to try and crank out some more of Trouble In My Head. I can't decide. I'll open the file and see if I can force myself out of this black hole of Chapter Six that I've fallen in, but I don't know.

a writing meme

I saw this in musesfool LJ and decided to steal it away and use it for my own evil procrastinator purposes.

{insert evil cackles}

1. Do you write your fics sequentially, or do you often find that you are writing the end first, and coming back to write a beginning later?

Usually, I write sequentially…unless I find myself having a hard time with a part and pretty much know the rest of the story ahead of time. Then I might skip ahead, but usually I start at the beginning and allow my characters to decide where we go for the most part.

2. Do you like to write one story to completion before beginning another, or do you have several stories in progress at any given time?

heh, heh, heh. If you’ve ever read anything of mine, you know the answer to that. I used to only undertake one story at a time and I was saner for it…but lately I’ve taken interest in more than one fandom, so I have a few projects up in the air.

3. What do you do to get past writer's block?

Look at the above answer. Most of those other fiction pieces stem from writer’s block on one. For instance, right now I’ve been trying to wade through a horrible case of the wb’s so I’ve been writing ficlets and taking requests to sort of help me break through the inspiration brick wall.

4. What inspires you for your fics?

To create the storyline? I don’t know that there is one thing in particular. A lot of times it’s something in Canon that’s left unanswered for and I want to create some sort of response. Sometimes it’s a song. And sometimes it’s just there—this idea.

5. What absolutely kills your ability to write?

There are a few things. A) my quest for perfectionism. I find myself editing excessively before I even finish a chapter to the point that nothing else gets accomplished. I’ve been working hard on this one area, but still, it cripples me. B) Insecurities. Every writer has them, I think. I always worry that each piece I write is terrible to the point that the readers would cry tears of blood upon seeing it. C) Stress. If too much is going on in my real life, it can either create a need for me to write something (usually terribly angsty) or depletes any interest in it whatsoever. D) Laziness. I’ll admit it. Sometimes I have these ideas, but I’m simply too lazy to do anything with it.

6. Do you plan your fics from beginning to end, or do you allow for some independent growth? If you do, how do you deal with any changes that arise in your story as you write it? If you don't, how do you bring the story to the conclusion you want?

I have the general concept in mind when I undertake a longer story/novel-length piece. I don’t have everything planned out though because I find that once I get going and allow myself to get invested in my characters, they have a tendency to take over for me. That sounds terribly (my new favorite adverb, I think) pretentious of me, but I find that I’m a schizophrenic writer who listens to the voices in her head.

7. What time of day/place is most conducive to fic writing and idea gathering?

I don't have specific times for writing on weekends and I can write pretty much anywhere/anytime (though I don't gaurantee quality at that point). I'm not a morning person for the most part, so I tend to avoid doing much in the wee hours of dawn.

Preferred method would be notebooks. One day someone will stumble into my house and think, “This girl is the Emily Dickinson of fanfiction.” (not for quality of course, but sheer quantity of notebooks all over the damn place that I never get rid of) I usually handwrite a lot of stuff out and then my first revisions occur when I move it from paper to the computer.

8. Do you tend to write certain characters, or do you try to push yourself to branch out into new voices? Why?

Well…as I posted earlier today, I’ve come to realize I tend to create lead protagonists who all suffer with daddy issues, but I digress. Yes, I have a tendency to make my lead characters somewhat (okay, maybe a lot) sarcastic because that’s the way I am. I do attempt to branch out from that. Reinventions was an attempt on my part to write a very different lead female character than I had in the past, one extremely different from me. I like to think I succeeded without creating too much of a caricature of a romantic sort of girl.

9. Do you like to stay within certain limits in you writing (like POV or tenses), or do you like to experiment? What is the most experimental piece of writing that you have done, and was it successful?

It’s an in between sort of thing for me. I’m much more willing to use fanfiction to experiment with style and different things than my regular works. I have no trouble switching around with POV’s, though I am most comfortable with 1st POV.

Most of my experimental stuff tends not to get posted for the world to see—it’s more an exercise for myself, to try to cull something out of what I started with, if that makes any sense. I think the most experimental fanfiction piece that I wrote and posted was It’s A Lance World After All. That was born out of one line that kept sticking in my head: ”He cured cancer and failed out of school.”

10. What was the most difficult story for you to write, and why?

I’m still writing one of them. It’s A New Journey, better known as my Maria-Roswell story. It’s very dark and relies heavily on description (actually, this began as one of those pieces where I was trying to work out my own demons with description/setting)—it’s also based on a plotline that would be considered campy if I allowed it to rule the story. The plotline is more just the catalyst to get my characters where they need to go, but it’s one of those must-tread-carefully pieces.

The other one was Oops I Hit Your Baby One More Time, the third installment in the Stalker Trilogy. This one was hard just because it was over-the-top insanity that required me to remember how to bring the funny (I think, overall, I managed to do it though there are parts that are quite the opposite of funny to me).

11. What determines your plots? In other words, do you like to write about issues, or to add them into the plot in some way? Or do you like pure character development? Smut? Or is it random development?

I love something that can work in all those things above, something that can deal with issues of some sort that we all grapple with while pushing the characters forward and having them gain some understanding. In fandom though, I have to say it’s all about the characters for me. It’s about getting inside their heads and finding out what makes them tick, the why more than the how.

12. What are you doing currently to challenge yourself?

Let’s see.

Original wise: I am in the process of edits on a new screenplay and working with my writing advisor on my novel.

Fandom wise: I’ve been doing ficlets and prompts to keep me writing and I am working on new chapters of the longer stories (though at a snail’s pace, I admit).

My main goal is always to write for at least an hour a day. Uninterrupted writing time—I attempt to use it for original work, but that doesn’t always happen.