the story that everyone is reading...

Like most of the livejournal community, I must admit that I got sucked into the story by charlottelennox that gave a thorough (if not one-sided) examination of much wankage of the past in the Harry Potter fandom.

The account is hardly impartial toward what seems to be one group of the fandom, whether that was due to author's omission or an inability to get any information from the other side, I don't know. But overall, I think it's an interesting read and look at a segment of time within fandom, as well as proving what it sets out to - that a certain person within the Harry Potter fandom successfully hijacked it and aided in turning numerous things into huge ordeals. I think it also sets out to show that BNFs, especially of the Harry Potter fandom, were considered in such high esteem (even if only within their own ranks) that it was impossible to believe that one of them was inciting all these problems, despite alleged proof being provided. I don’t know about that – as I’d like to think it was more a case of “why would my friend do that sort of thing to me?” mentalities – but I found it interesting that proof was ignored for some time.

So that’s been my past few days. Not writing, but reading all ten chapters of the story and thinking, “Wow. It's nice to read about a sociopath working her magic throughout one fandom whenever she got bored enough.” I feel quite badly for her "friends" who were duped, but more than anything, I found myself asking "Why?" over and over. Why would anyone do this? Why did it matter to this person so much to be a part of the "BNF clique" that's mentioned? Why go to such extremes for something that's supposed to be fun?

In fairness, I'll be the first to admit that I don't know much about any of this outside of what I just read. I'm a peripheral sort of participant in the Harry Potter fandom and always have been. Actually, that pretty much sums up my fandom participation in general - I do my own thing, read what I like, ignore what I don't, and try not to get caught up in drama...and if I make some great friends along the way, all the better. I don’t know the people discussed in this story and I don’t really know much about most of the wanks that occurred. I simply find it intriguing the lengths at which some people will go to become a “BNF” and/or achieve notoriety.

I guess the closest I’ve ever come to dealing with BNFs was back when I was heavily involved in the Nsync fandom. I was never a BNF, but I knew some of them, and some of the crap that went on was...bizarre. And there were a few of them that seemed to attract so much ire, maybe deservingly/maybe not, that it could take over the entire fandom for days. Even then, I never understood the appeal of such things, but I can imagine how in a bigger fandom like Harry Potter things could quickly move from amusing wank to insanity. And that intrigues me.

I have no real interest in the outcomes of those involved (whether defending them or arguing that they are evil incarnate), as much as trying to figure out the appeal of undertaking such activities. What type of person does this sort of thing? A sociopath? Someone with a lot of time on his/her hands? Is your own life that lacking? I mean, I hardly have the most exciting personal life, but I guess it keeps me busy enough that I don't go around starting up drama on the Internet.

And what is it about the idea of popularity on the Internet and Livejournal that is so appealing to everyone? Is it like a different form of high school for some – a way to be included in the “in crowd”?

It’s all so baffling to me. And maybe it’s because I’ve been through it in real life. I was a horrible bitch in my early high school career. God, I hated myself half the time, all in the name of popularity. And it just got to the point where I wondered, “What’s the point? What am I really gaining from this?” And I was much happier once I didn’t bother with getting caught up in all the drama and crap that went on. So, is that what this is – people working out their own issues with what constitutes friends versus friends because of who I am/who I could be?

There are plenty of meta pieces and such on popular fandom writers versus BNFs and whether the two are linked. I can say that as a writer, I’d always love more feedback. It’s a wonderful thing for a writer. It lets us know that people are reading and hopefully enjoying what is being written. It shouldn't be the only motivation for writing, but I’m a firm believer that most of us write to share our work with others. Otherwise, no one else would ever see it.

But how does one go from desiring more readers and going about normal avenues of pimping to desiring constant attention and the sort of love/hate relationships the Internet seems to have with BNFs? How does one decide that turning fandom into a hateful place for so many people is the way to achieve one’s own fame?

I wish I knew. Instead, all I can do is shake my head and move on, because I'm afraid we'll never really have the answers to those questions.